The Gay Community in Buenos Aires

In response to the prior post on attitudes toward gays in Argentina, I would say that certainly Buenos Aires is a gay friendly destination. Besides having one of the only two "gay hotels" in the world (the Axel--which jokingly calls itself "hetero-friendly"), there are many gay clubs, gay and lesbian activities and events, not to mention the fact that Argentina hosted the Gay World Cup (of soccer) in 2008. There is even a gay wine store in Buenos Aires with its own Gay Wine label. Obviously many gay friendly activities, organizations and businesses exist here. Negative attitudes toward gays and derrogatory language, however, are quite common as well. Calling someone a "puto" or "maricon" can be heard at any sporting event, just like in the US. I would say that the two cultures are very similar in this respect. In the provinces also, much like in rural America, attitudes are much more oppresive. This is probably what leads many gays to flock to bigger, more gay friendly cities in general around the world. With a larger community that is socially more liberal and accepting, life is easier.

The Problem with Monedas (Change/Coins)

This is really really annoying. To the point that I have to actually ask the question: is a single peso coin worth more than a two peso note? The answer is quite clearly yes! Several situations, the most recently of which just happened right now, as I sit here in this fair coffee shop, have popped up in the last week. Ok, so everyone knows that change is hard to come by in Argentina, that breaking 100 peso notes is hard, and that the buses only take coins, but it seems as if no one really understands the gravity of this problem. Here are a few situations: 1. Cab driver gives me a two peso note as change when I paid with a 20 for a fare that was 19.12. He would rather give the two peso note and LOSE MONEY than give up his coins. 2. Coffee shop last friday. Bill is 9 pesos. I pay with a 10 peso note. No change is given. I asked for the coin. Then they asked me for a coin so they could give me a two peso note. Why should I even have to ask for my change? I said I would leave an extra two peso note as tip if they gave me the coin. They said NO!!! (and they even laughed about it) 3. Coffee shop just now. Bill is 14. I pay with a 5 and 10. 1 peso change is due. No change is offered. Same situation as 2 (but a different location). 4. (And here is the kicker...) I go to the bank to get change. I walk to the front of the line to change a 5 into 5 coins. They say that they will only give 3. That their policy has changed. 5 is too much now. Oh, and also, I have to wait in the line of 40 people to do a transaction that will take all of 30 seconds. So the bank is putting up barriers (lowering/taking away incentives) to actually have correct change. Don't people realize that they are paralyzing their own economy when they do this? That when the people at the supermarket, or kiosk, or corner store refuse to make sales because they do not want to lose coins that there are dead weight losses? Everywhere down here there are signs posted (subway, train, stores, etc) that say "No hay monedas" or "Colaboren con monedas", and this does not help the problem. People are so afraid of giving away coins that they hoard them. I have seen many many kiosks that refuse to sell me a 10 centavo item for a 2 peso note because they know that I just want the change. So then I offer to buy something worth 1 peso, so I can still get the 1 peso moneda, and ride the bus--and they still refuse! This amounts to economic insanity. When the value of a one peso coin clearly outweighs the value of 2 pesos printed on paper, something is drastically wrong with the system. There are only 2 things that I see as possibilities: 1. People need the coins to take the bus. This is really the only thing in the whole of Argentina that operates only on coins. The bus system is also extremely extensive and is probably the main mode of transportation (although I don't have exact figures and the subway could be more) and as such, requires a huge influx of coins to operate. So the only logical explanation is that this huge influx of coins is not balanced by an equal outflow (i.e. the bus companies don't go to the bank and deposit these coins in their accounts thus giving the banks enough coins to give unlimited quantities as they do in the U.S. and other developed countries). But why would the bus companies do this? The only explanation I can come up with here is that they don't trust the banks and therefore hoard coins. Yikes. Anyone else have a thought on this? 2. There actually aren't enough coins in circulation. Supply and demand. Under supply and high demand. Again, the only place where there is a real high demand and no counterbalance is the bus system. Would it be possible to solve both problems (because they are not mutually exclusive) with a card system? As in people buy 10 peso or 20 peso bus cards that can be punched or scanned and avoid this change issue. I think that's wishful thinking.

Living in Argentina vs. China

It's interesting that I found so many similarities between China and Argentina. I'm sure many nationals from both countries would be appalled by my saying that. But it's true. Both Argentina and China have very homogeneous populations. I'm not sure the percentages in China vs. Argentina but walking down the street in China you see--guess what--Chinese people!! And in Argentina, pretty much everyone looks Southern European (unless we are talking about the Northwest near Bolivia). Cost of living is very similar. In the big cities in China you can get great dinners with multiple dishes for less that 5 US per person--same in Argentina. Wages are about 5000 RMB per month for a middle income person which is about 850 dollars. That will pay your 300-400 dollar rent per month plus food and transportation. Now transportation is interesting. I have been to MANY cities all over the world and never found one cheaper than Buenos Aires for public transportation. Rio, Santiago, Lima, La Paz, Beijing, Shanghai are all at least double the cost for subways and buses. One of the drawbacks to China, though, and one of the dissimilarities is the westernization/Americanization of the big cities in China. Many districts exist in both Shanghai and Beijing where all you can find is brand name American clothing, accessories and luxury goods. This exists in Argentina too, but in my estimate, the majority of the country's retail is mom and pop shops. Of course, in China you have the infamous fake markets where you can get a "Gucci" bag for 10% of what it retails for in the US. Everyone kept saying "you want LV? LV? LV?", and me being rather label ignorant, I kept thinking: "What is El V?" Yikes.

Race(ism) in Argentina

Che, Negro

One of the first people to come visit me in Argentina was my friend Paul. Paul is about 6 foot 4 (193cm), 240 pounds (110kg), has Nigerian black skin and at that time sported an afro. Now I am the one who is used to getting all the attention when I walk around because I am 197cm with curly blond hair and I too sport an afro at times. But when I took Paul to calle Florida to people watch, they ended up watching him. I have never seen so many heads turn and stare. Thankfully, Paul is very easy going and has a great sense of humor. We discussed it afterward.

The conclusion we arrived at, was that there was not the slightest hint of racism or prejudice conveyed by the Argentines. What we witnessed, was novelty. Paul said, “It’s like the first time you go to the zoo and see a giraffe—you stare—not because you hate the giraffe, not because you wish it ill will or think it’s going to steal from you but because it’s very different than any other animal you have ever seen before.” And Paul is right, with less than 4% of the population of African ancestry, and most of those living toward the north of the country, it is not surprising that this country of mostly Italian and Spanish immigrants is surprised when they see an African face.

I took Paul to several parties where mainly locals were gathered at people’s homes, drinking, playing cards, etc. He was welcomed and kissed just like any other person and nobody gave it much thought. There were some comments made, like “Che, ese negro es un negro de verdad, “ and the like, but these were simply observations/ jokes/comments that meant nothing more than calling the guy with the big nose “pipa” (like pipe) or calling me “grandote” (giant). It is a real assessment of the physical nature of the person and says nothing about stereotype, prejudice or bigotry. This tends to be the way of things in Argentina in general. Here, they call a spade a spade.

Interestingly, the word “negro” in Argentina can often be used like we use the word “dude” in English. Often, the person in a group who has the darkest features will be called “El Negro.” But the interesting thing is that I find that Americans in particular, myself included, will be ultra sensitive to race issues as we have been conditioned to think this way. Many Americans, even though we are not racist or bigoted in the slightest, will look at a Black person or Hispanic (in the U.S.) and think (within a split second) “Oh, there is a (person of color) and I shouldn’t stare. But I also shouldn’t look like I’m trying not to stare so I won’t look away too quickly. And I’m not supposed to assume that they are going to rob me, because they aren’t, they are just normal people. Why would I assume something about a person (of color) I don’t know? Oh, shit I’ve thought about this too long, maybe I am a racist. I’m such a horrible person for even thinking that it would be ok to not stare at a person of color. I’m still thinking about it….” An Argentine would never over-think, let alone even think about this type of situation in that fashion. When it comes to physical appearance, they are direct: a fat guy they call “el gordo” and that is how he is designated in place of his name, a skinny guy is “el flaco”, a redhead “el Colorado”, a bald guy, “el pelado,” etc. This is not out of malice, this is the way things are. Es así.

Gifts for Weddings in Argentina

Cash is King

It seemed odd to me, that for the several weddings I have been to in Argentina people asked for cash as their wedding gift. I have always been taught that cash—while extremely useful and certainly an appropriate gift from an uncle or grandparent—constitutes a quite tacky gift between peers. Yet every couple whose wedding I have attended in Argentina has asked for money. So this led to several heated discussions between my girlfriend and I over whether money is an appropriate wedding gift to ASK FOR.…

Times are changing, Lourdes (my girlfriend) would argue. People don’t get married then go to live together, they go to live together and then they get married. Thus the old adage of newlyweds “building a house” together doesn’t really apply, because most newlyweds will have already done most of that. So blenders and dishes and furniture are no longer gifts of preference because many couples already have that. This I understand.

What I have trouble wrapping my brain around, though, is the idea that the wedding costs a lot of money and that therefore I should, in essence, make a donation to the cause. This has been an argument used to justify cash gifts. The problem, though, is that I didn’t decide to put on the wedding in the first place. Many couples elope and decide to do things on their own or with small groups of more intimate friends and family at a very low cost. Cost, therefore, is all up to the people putting on the wedding and if they cannot afford it, they shouldn’t do it (although many a politician might disagree with that). Also, I didn’t decide what to spend the money on for the wedding. I don’t even know if I’m going to like the food (which I didn’t at any of them save one) let alone the ceremony. So what I feel basically is that I’m being asked to attend a ceremony by a friend (or acquaintance) of mine, that will be catered to their tastes and that I should give them money to use for their honeymoon or bill paying or for the wedding and reception itself.

I have thrown many a party in my life and I have never asked for people to pay to come in the door. There might have been a couple of parties I attended in college where some drunken guy with a baseball hat on backwards was asking for 5 bucks for a plastic cup at the keg but besides that I have not heard of asking for cash as a wedding gift. But maybe I’m in the dark. Maybe this phenomenon is all too common and I just haven’t paid enough attention. I wonder, though, is it common in both the US and Argentina? What about other countries in the world?

I await your feedback…